One step forward, two steps back

Today, Kacy and I attended a short musical at school that his regular-ed classmates were putting on.   My goal was to get him into the auditorium without a "transition meltdown."  Thankfully, due to a few strategies and a whole lotta luck, we made it without a scream, stomp, or tear!  While walking down the aisle to find a place to sit, he spotted the familiar faces of the special education aides and the other students with special needs that Kacy would spend a majority of his school day with.  He walked right over to them and sat down, leaving me to sit across the aisle by myself.  Initially, I was thrilled!  I was so thankful he wanted to sit with his old buddies, he remembered the routine and didn't bat one eye about leaving me alone.  However... in less than 2 minutes, Kacy was sitting there exhibiting the socially inappropriate behaviors that I have spent the last six months trying to reduce/eliminate/exchange.  The "Stevie Wonder" impression, the spontaneous clapping, chewing on his shirt, the squeaks and noises... they were back.  I am confident, had he sat with me, he would have sat there quietly, arms crossed, head resting against the back of the chair, watching the musical and clapping after songs.  I just know this would have happened because for the past six months, we have been really focusing on his social behavior and and he has shown a great deal of improvement.  Outside of rocky transitions, he will usually sit quietly and behave accordingly.   Today's behavior was so upsetting to me, but let me be clear that  I'm not mad at the aides for allowing him to sit there and act like that.  It's that I feel defeated.  Did he know he could "get away" with it? Was he excited and trying to calm himself?  Did he revert out of habit?  And now what?  When he heads back to school in August, what am I suppose to do?  It's impossible for all of his goals to be met in the regular classroom, but the importance of the influence of behavior was obvious today.  What is more important?  That he can complete a puzzle or put all the blue plastic bears in a blue bowl, or be able to cope and behave in different environments so that he can be an active member of our family?  *sigh  Just when we made one step forward, we take two steps back.